Hi, I need to committ blog catharsis, so here I am. It is Tuesday, October 30, the eve of Halloween (that sounds much better than "day before Halloween").
Why am I writing this blog entry, when I am in neither Clearwater or Thailand, as these were supposed to be the topics of all future blog entries? Is that a long question?
Because I'm messed up.
No, seriously, I'm messed up.
I threw my back out again yesterday. I don't think it ever completely healed from the initial injury last month.
My peroneal tendonitis in my left foot is back.
I developed tendonitis in the back of my right leg while trying to keep weight off my left foot.
I feel like a freakin' cripple.
Swimming hurts. Biking hurts. Running hurts. See, this is what happens when you race hard all season. It's the risk that you take. Of course, it was all worth it.
HERE is my frustrating dilemna. I'm signed up to race Half Ironman World Championships in 11 days. I'm signed up to race in Thailand on December 3. Hotels are booked. Plane tickets are bought. Race entries are paid. Everything is set up.
And all I really want to do is just NOTHING. I want to quit training, and now I can't. I'm roped in. I'm painted into a corner.
Hawaii was supposed to be the culmination of the season, and it was an injury fest. I still haven't bounced back. I haven't been able to go hard and fast in I don't know how long. I'm losing my touch. Losing my speed. These next two races are going to SUCK unless I figure something out.
OK, I've ranted. Over and out.
Ben
3 comments:
Benny,
Wow. I am going to pray /a lot/ for you before the Florida race. I hope you can take in some serious resting at some point. It's sweet you get to be with your so much of our fam while in Florida, they will be therapeutic in non-medical ways :]...they are really excited you're coming their way.
I don't think you've lost your touch. I think more your touch is injured and needs some time to heal.
I love you! mwah....Mom
Ben,
You feel broken and tired and you are hurt and want to feel normal and back too the way you always feel. Don't let your trainer know lol :)
Anything we say may sound contrite and bland but here it is.
You have done so much with this amazing gift of your body that God has given you. You are blessed to walk, talk, breathe and move on your own volition. You have been put into a place where now you not only can be empathetic to your clients but sympathetic as well.
As you go about these malodies of pain and strife remember you are blessed and will be blessed as you, your family and all of us who care for you pray for a speedy recovery and the ability for you to complete your races in the times you want to finish them in.
When you start to hurt and get discouraged it has helped us to say " Hello pain I've been expecting you come run, bike etc... with me" Or I pray and give thanks for everything that I can do.
We are pulling for you and praying that everything goes well and you can kick tri-butt. Be strong Were pulling for you and can't wait for more blog entries!
Michelle and Jay
Ben,
You must be in Florida by now. I just read your blog.
Ouch!! It makes me hurt reading about how you are feeling.
Ditto the other two comments...
I pray, you pray we all pray!!
Best of luck Ben....May the gift of
healing be bestowed upon you ASAP!!
YOU ROCK!!!!
Diane
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